I CAN'T EVEN SPEEL!

Writing is hard.

No, really. Ritin iz harrd. The nuts and bolts of actually writing a full novel is very tricky. I mean, I could probably throw out a thousand words in ten minutes if I wanted to discuss why I dislike Nickleback or how important it is to eat fajitas once a week. Writing stuff which is funny and stupid and honest is a breeze. Think about your current partner. Think about people at work. Think about that time in Amsterdam you got really messed up. You could probably write quite a lot about them easily and enjoy doing it.

Writing a long piece of work, especially fiction, is difficult. Not only does it have to remain interesting but it has to make sense. Well, technically it doesn't but that probably won't result in anything great. I've read plenty of books where stuff just happened with no real rhyme or reason. "I'm a reserved, insecure young woman but I just had to sleep with that guy to express my sense of freedom!"

Really? Or did you sleep with that guy because he happened to be an undercover agent, and if you hadn't there wouldn't be a book?

(That isn't aimed at anything specific, by the way. I'm hardly one to start criticising other works before I've had a single word printed.)

But yeah. Writing Queen of the World was hard. It's a matter of motivation and self-doubt. Does this character work? Why am I writing this scene? Is anyone going to be interested in this plot? Why did that character do that? What could I be doing instead? Isn't YouTube more fun that this?

When I hit a scene in my work that I really enjoy, or have been looking forward to reaching - it's usually one where action happens, or where some plots merge and things start to make sense - then it's good fun. I can plough through that like a tractor tearing up a plot of particularly soft mushrooms. But when it's something else, and where I need to do some research or work out character motivation, then it can be a drag. I can write the same paragraph for hours and still end up chucking it. It's the problem of being someone who believes in character progression over plot dictation. Sometimes my characters simply wouldn't do something I need them to do, so I need to work out a way around it. An intelligent and skilled man trying to avoid detection by his enemies isn't going to suddenly decide that a two-week shopping holiday in New York is a good idea, even if I really need to get that character to a New York shopping mall.

The self doubt in me sometimes exploits this and just yells at me. My inner critic sounds like Alan Rickman. His heavy, drawling tones will whisper in my ear "This is futile. It's too slow, the writing is boring and the characters aren't likeable. What's the point? You might as well go back to playing World of Warcraft and stop trying to make a career of this."

Usually a can of Red Bull and a cigarette shuts him up. Usually.

It's kind of stressful at the moment because not only am I trying to write a follow-up to Queen of the World but I'm also trying to learn Norwegian and earn money. Writing another hundred thousand words just seems like trying to cut down a redwood with a piece of cheese. But I'll get there. I love writing even when it's hard, and I love the characters and the world I have so far.

Wouldn't it be great is all jobs were like that?

Other updates - no reponse from the publisher I did a full submission to(yet), so at least I haven't been turned down (yet). I've joined Twitter - find me @HennessyWrites . It's pretty addicitve. Also, I've got a craving for hamburgers which I'm judiciously encouraging. There's worse things to be addicted to.

If you're considering being a writer then read this. Read it if you like reading things which make you laugh, as well. Then buy his book.